Brain overload!

So, I got up Sunday morning and went straight to the kitchen to take my thyroid medicine. Somewhere along the way, they discovered I have thyroid problems. Anyways, I always take my thyroid medicine right when I get up in the morning because I have to wait an hour before I eat. Eating breakfast, for me, is a non-negotiable. I need all of the nourishment I can get to keep up with those crazy kids!
I keep my medicine on my kitchen counter, all 5 bottles of it. I take as many pills as my grandparents these days! For some strange reason I decided to read all of my pill bottles Sunday morning and I discovered that I have been taking some of my medicine wrong for almost 2 months! When they diagnosed me with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) they put me on metformin, which is a diabetes medicine....don't ask. I just take the medicine. Anyways, I was supposed to take 1 pill a day for the first week, and then go up to 2 pills a day the second week, and then 3 pills a day the third week. So basically, I have been taking 1 pill a day for 2 months, instead of increasing like I was supposed to. When I made this discovery, I did the only thing I could...ran into the bedroom and woke my sweet husband up. I was so upset and annoyed at myself. The sad thing is that I have been oh-so-proud of myself for remembering to take all of my medicine everyday. All of my pride was a farse! I messed up my medicine again!
Ughhhhhh! This scheduling and medicine taking and paperworking and errand-running and regular jobbing and trying to maintain a normal "healthy" lifestyling is making me crazy! I feel like my brain cells are being eaten alive...eaten alive by the infertility monster!
Oh well, what can you do? I am starting the 2 pill a day thing. Please pray that I remember to go to 3 pills a day next Sunday (Easter). And I guess I can turn up some loud music and dance! That's always a great alternative to screaming at the top of my lungs! We devised a paperwork plan tonight. I have to implement it tomorrow. The ridiculous errand-running will commence tomorrow at 9am. I have my list ready and then it's off to work. Gotta get ready for Good Friday and Easter services! Good thing God is in control! Lord, help me focus tomorrow at work and provide me with amazing help Friday and Sunday with the kids. And don't let me forget in all of my madness that there are little children coming this weekend that I am charged to love and teach the gospel to. Also, Lord, I really want to sit in service on Sunday with my brother and sister-in-law. That's right people...Mayson will be in the house on Sunday! My fiery, little, red-headed niece is sure to liven things up a bit!
Love you guys,
Amanda

Clover, it's like she knows

Clover is my furry baby, my sweet pup. She gets me, like no one can. We got Clover in January 2006. She was so good for me. I was just starting to peek my head out of the hole I had put myself in when we brought her home. One of my biggest struggles in the beginning of this infertility thing was getting out of bed in the morning. I fought so hard to get up every morning, but my body was fighting against me. And then when I would give in and sleep longer, I would feel so guilty. I would beat myself up all day long for sleeping so late. Here's a hint: It's not good to beat yourself up over anything. It only makes things worse. If I could have only allowed myself to sleep in every now and then without feeling so guilty maybe I would have been able to get up the next day. I perpetuated that problem for sure.
One of the other things about me was that I was a clean freak, not a neat freak, a clean freak. There is a huge difference. As many of you know, puppies can not hold it for very long, and since I was so not okay with Clover relieving herself in my house, i would get up and let her out. When she had done her business I would want to go back to bed, but her cute little puppy self would make me smile. One sweet look from her and I was up and at 'em. She needed me. I think I needed to be needed.
I was not alone anymore. She became my jogging buddy...my riding in the car buddy...my cleaning the house buddy...my reading buddy. She was always doing whatever I was doing. And when I got home at night and Michael was in class until late, Clover was there to greet me. That's the great thing about dogs. They are so excited to see you, everyday, it never fails.
And sometimes I talk to Clover, sounds so crazy, I know. It's kind of like talking to yourself, but it's way better because you actually get a response from something. Clover totally turns her head and trys to make out what I am saying. She's probably listening for Sit, Stay, Come, Down, Kennel, or No because that's pretty much the extent of her vocabulary, but it's just the fact that she really wants to listen to me...so cute! She perks her ears up. She gets excited if I sound excited. She lays her head on my lap when I am quiet. She knows her momma.
I know it sounds like the most ridiculous thing in the world to most of you, but this dog helped me get over the hump and get back to life! And now we are best friends! ha/ha
P.S. Michael and I finished our last training day on Saturday. We are finishing up our paperwork this week. Because of Spring Break I get some extra time off, but I started not feeling so great Sunday afternoon. I think I have some kind of virus, my stomach is not okay right now. Hopefully I will feel better soon. I have work to do!